long nights won't last forever

Tonight Ren & I spent a few minutes talking about furniture and rearranging and closet cleaning in preparation for the arrival of baby Elijah in about 11 weeks. She is giddy with beautiful sweet love for her baby boy and I am thrilled to have them in my home. She spoke: Me and Elijah are gonna have so much fun in here! I mean, I know I'll be tired but long nights won't last forever.

My babies are 4 1/2, 3 1/2, and 21 months. It almost hurts to write because I long to stretch out their young little lives and hold onto every single second with them. And the longer I mama, the more I ache for that. When Madeline was a baby I think I rushed her. I looked forward to the next milestone, next word, next thing she would learn. And in doing so I think I missed too much of the now with her. I am sorry for that. I am pretty sure she is no worse off for it but I aim now to do it better. When Simeon & Anna came along so quickly I was forced into slowness. And the slowness became more and more what I wanted and what I took so much joy in. Many would look at Anna and think she was younger than almost 2. I believe that is all my doing. You see, I baby her just a teeny tiny bit. And I love it.

I'm certain I sleep more consecutively at night than I did in my nursing baby days. But I am also certain I go to bed late, get up early, and have one-two children in my room at some point at least 5 nights a week. There is just so much to do in order to savor my moments within my days with each of my kiddos. Right now, after putting all my babies to sleep, my dishwasher is running, my washer is running, diapers just got folded, another load awaits folding, I made a grocery list, and on any given night 10ish things could be added or taken away from this list. This is not a brag, I know you other mama's do the same. It is so often exhausting...mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually. But I am pushed more and more to slow down, enjoy, and make the most of what God has given me.

So my long nights may not last forever, but for now, I will be thankful for each one.